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..smile..
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November 20, 2009 @ 3:10 PM
i'm.blue. i'm.black. i.hate.you. or.i.don't. lies.or.truth. exist.or.not. doesn't.matter. heaven.or.hell. you.or.me. him.or.her. i.don't.care. damn. black.or.blue. real.or.fake. like.or.hate. friend.or.foe. maybe.it's.there. maybe.it's.not. maybe.there.is. maybe.there's.not.. maybe.i.know. maybe.i.don't. myabe.you.do. or.you.do.not. whatever. i.don't.feel.like.going.anymore. i.feel.isolated. left.out. maybe.i'll.just.stay.at.home. and.rot. hopefully. whatever.finds.me. away.from.reality. away.from.here. even.if.it's.only.for.an.hour. i'll.be.glad. escaping.away. from.reality. cause.it.hurts. alot. if.only.it.existed. if.only.it.did. i.wish. but.it'll.never.happen. i.guess.it's.just.something.that.will.never.come.true. November 11, 2009 @ 7:51 PM
i.thought.coming.clean.was.the.better.choice. little.did.i.know. it.messed.up.the.entire.situation. screwed.up.big.time. it.makes.me.wonder.all.over.again. if.i.did.the.right.thing. by.spilling.everything. cos.now.everyone.is.guilty. i.was.the.one.who.started.this. so.i.should.be.ending.this. right? i.didnt.expect.that.telling.the.truth.bout.what.i.felt.was.disastrous. i.thought.by.telling.the.truth. everyone.would.be.happier.cos.they.understand. but.obviously. it.turned.out.otherwise. guilt.is.consuming.all.of.us. and.i.really.really.feel.damn.bad. now.that.he's.taking.the.blame.on.himself.it.makes.me.even.more.guilty. maybe. by.keeping.things.to.myself.makes.everyone.happier. i.really.don't.know.how.i'm.gonna.clean.up.this.mess. but. by.hook.or.by.crook. i'm.gonna.solve.this.thing.by.tml.night. clear.things.up. and.hope.things.will.be.alright. cos.i.don't.wanna.sacrifice.friendship.because.of.all.these. November 6, 2009 @ 9:14 PM
i'm.sick.&.i'm.tired. 站.在.广.场.中.央. 来.来.往.往.的.人.群.中. 没.有.属.于.她.的. 一.个.人. 站.着. 闭.上.眼. 想: 一.个.人.是.出.众.的. 她. 笑.了. sick.&.tired.of.being.the.one.to.give.in.all.the.time. becoming.the.coward.that.wasn't.really.me. it's.not.the.way.i.should.be. i.had.to.be.cautious.with.my.words.but.never.did.you. i.had.to.observe.all.the.time.and.wonder.if.the.fault.lies.with.me. had.to.observe.your.emotions. know.when.to.and.not.to.do.this.or.that. it.tires.me. i.tried.to.ignore. but.it's.pretty.hard. cause.i.think.i.care. even.though.i.tried.really.hard.not.to. because.i.didnt.know.if.its.worth.it. i'm.trying.to.endure.as.much.as.i.can. but.i.don't.know.when.i'll.fall.apart. it's.kinda.eating.me.up. it.makes.me.feel.like.nothing. at.times.i.felt.as.if.i've.been.trampled.all.over. used. but.i.don't.know.what.to.do. or.should.have.done. i.felt.like.i.had.to.be.by.your.beck.and.call. but.you.werent.there.for.me.when.i.needed.you. and.it.wasnt.fair.for.me.to.give.up.some.issues.either. but.i.couldnt.have.a.firm.stand. just.not.strong.enough.t0.fight.you. and.myself. |
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